June 2013 Philadelphia Chapter of Pax Christi U.S.A.
Echoes in Purgatory II, SCI Graterford
A collection of writings by men who are serving a Life Sentence Without Parole [the other death sentence]. Read their words, then listen quietly and you will hear their cry for their God given “Right to Redemption.” …
*These reflections were written in the spring of 2013
Echoes is a continuing effort of CPF and Lifers Inc. to educate the public and our legislators about the injustice of Life without Parole here in PA.
I was taught in this country of mine that a person is redeemable, that they deserve another chance. My greatest fear is that I would have to go down knowing that I had been told a lie, that I had been led to expect payment for work done and there
was no payment.
A life sentence is an endless black hole. It just keeps sucking everything in because that’s all this place does. Just sucks in and keeps you there.
Even though the life sentence says that it is permanent, you want to hold faith and hope that it’s temporary. When they say ‘life sentence’ they take a man’s hope, and when you take his hope, what else does he have? It’s like climbing up a mountain but wondering where is the top?
Just like there is a thin line between love and hate, there is a thin line between good and bad for me serving a life sentence. The good: being in prison has saved my life to some degree because I was able to grow and mature and to educate myself in so many ways. The bad: I have been constantly reminded everyday for the past 38 years that I killed a man, and how
both he and I have missed out on being a son, a brother, an uncle, or a father to our children and grandchildren. With a Tear and a Smile.
I compare a life sentence to a death sentence, except they haven’t given me an execution date.
Life is like being in a large room where you can’t feel the walls. It is dark, pitch black. You don’t know how far it is from one end to the other. You don’t see the light. Everyone talks about it but you don’t see it.
A life sentence to me is something far more sinister than what most Pennsylvanians would, or could’ve ever imagined. I’m
often asked mostly by siblings, aren’t you ready to come home, you’ve been in jail what, twenty (20) + years. Isn’t life twenty years in Pennsylvania? No! In all reality if ;you’re found guilty of murder, be it principal or conspirator, death by attrition will be your dreadful sentence, whether it’s 1st or 2nd degree. Who knew Pennsylvania presently has two death penalties: i.e. two first followed by third. Who knew!
A life sentence is like going from the laughter with your Children, the memory of my Mother’s face, the echo of my Father’s
voice, to this deep Dark Hole somewhere beneath the earth, and the only way out is in a Box.
A mandatory sentence of life without the possibility of parole (LWOP) is cruel, and in most cases, flat-out evil’ it is torturous, degrading, and inhumane. In some ways, it is even worse than death.
25 years ago my attorney told me that I would be out of here in 15 years, he never said life meant you would die here behind these walls.
If you would like to comment or respond to any of the above reflections, the envelope needs to include: the man’s name, number,
P.O. Box 244,
Graterford, PA 19426